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High school presents numerous challenges in the life for a teenager, especially when they feel as if they are navigating it alone. This is why I believe every teenager needs a mentor, a “coach” of sorts, who intentionally seeks to guide them through the struggles and celebrate the victories. The years spent in high school have the potential of becoming the incubation season for a life that is revolutionary, which is why I love pouring my time and resources into teenagers. The following is a summary of a message I presented at this year’s “Fields of Faith,” an event sponsored by the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. In ten minutes, I shared ten things I wish someone had told me in high school, praying that God may build humility and greatness in the coming generation. Here is the list:
1. You are not as smart as you think you are…in fact, you’re an idiot. I say that in joking, but I really wish someone had been straightforward with me on this point. The fact is, pride develops early and only gets stronger with age. Build humility into your life; learn as much as you can from as many people as you can as often as you can. I remember John Maxwell stating that as a young man he would pay business leaders and executives for an hour of their time so he could ask questions and learn from them. Don’t pay, but definitely find leaders and learn.
2. Peer pressure passes: don’t let it rule you or ruin you. The fact is, most teens experience temptation and pressure to conform from something or someone in their life. So recognize that this will pass and these situations will not define your life. Jesus was always fighting the pressure to conform and be what everyone else believed He should be. Yet He never buckled under the pressure; He defined His life by God’s mission, and you should too.
3. Believe that you are usable. During the teen years, everyone struggles with their sense of worth. I can’t do anything of value, God could never use me, I failed too many times, my struggle is too shameful. Yet this is not the view of God: God created you for purpose, He designed you for His glory, and He has a plan to use you that is crazy-awesome. So find your purpose: fall in love with Jesus, study His words in the whole Bible, and discover with the help of a pastor or leader how you can serve God now, just like you are.
4. Don’t let good keep you from greatness. I read in a book once that good is the enemy of greatness. So average is the enemy of a great life. Anyone can be average: a nice home, steady job, spouse, 2.5 children and a dog. Greatness is rare, but God is calling you to it. Jesus wasn’t average, He rocked the world. His followers then weren’t average, and they shouldn’t be now. So don’t settle for good when God calls you to greatness.
5. Be creative and take risks. Believe it or not, God is not against creative, artistic expressions or against taking bold, risky, adventurous steps of faith. Genesis 1 shows us the God who is creative, and the gospels show us the God who risks. Don’t chicken out when God calls you to take a bold step, and don’t extinguish the God-given creativity that defines you: use it!
6. Today’s stuff is tomorrow’s junk. Landfills are filled with junk that someone at one time thought was the greatest invention ever created. I once believed that if I did not own a Game-Boy I would never know true happiness. White-washed jeans with elastic waist lines were once cool. Now they are embarrassing. My point is that whatever stuff you think is so amazing and necessary…isn’t. Ipads as we know them now will be obsolete one day. Don’t make your stuff the most important things in your life.
7. Value the relationships that last outside High School. Your friends now will probably not be your friends at your ten year reunion. In fact, I guarantee it will be a little awkward. But God has given you relationships that will last: a relationship with Him, your parents, siblings, family. Lifelong friends are out there, just make sure you are investing in the best relationships.
8. Give yourself permission not to be perfect. I love this one. Most of us hate failure and allow it to drive us to fear of ever trying new things. Don’t fear failure; in fact, embrace it. I got this statement from Perry Stone: It’s ok to fail as long as you are attempting great things. In fact, that is the only way great things ever develop, after a lot of failures along the way!
9. Check your heart…a lot. Proverbs 4:23 says that your heart is the wellspring of your life. Guard it; keep it clean and pure. Lots of things and people are going to want the affection of your heart, but only Jesus deserves it. Make Him the #1 owner of your heart.
10. Say every morning these words: God is God, and I am not. Rick Warren taught me this, and it has been invaluable when I begin to feel overwhelmed or believe that the world rests on my shoulders. If we don’t continually reminder ourselves that we are not God, we will try to act like we are. So trust Him, live for Him, and love the journey He has intentionally put you on!
